Wednesday 25 May 2011

If you've got an itch....scratch it!???

Whilst having a quiet drink out the other evening I involuntarily overheard a giggling female proclaim rather loudly to her girlfriend that she had purchased  an Ann Summers "Whisper" vibrator! I thought to myself that she should perhaps whisper about it, rather than loudly advertise her intimate DIY sessions across the crowded bar! That aside like most single women of any age, her sexual needs are there to be fulfilled and a vibrator is one sure way of getting there.

The altenative? Acquire a fwb (friend with benefits) or have casual (safe)sex with whoever, whenever it takes her fancy. Dating sites are numerous, catering  for all needs, whether you just need to scratch that itch -  "Shagbook" is the adult version of  Facebook, claiming to be a safe secure no strings attached adult dating site. I fail to see the relavance of using the word "dating" in the profile of the Facebook of sex! This is clearly a way to just hook up for one on one, no dating required. What next, the sexual gratification alternative of "My Space" ....... "My Place...or yours"?? Whilst other sites such as eharmony and match.com, suggest that the possibility of meeting your "soulmate" is within reach should you join their community for a monthly fee. These are all harmless enough as long as expectations are kept to a minimum and an open mind is ever present.

More worryingly, however, are recently emerging sites aimed at "married" people! Yes, you read correctly. They claim to be an alternative source of passion for those Mr & Mrs's in unfulfilling relatonships. Husbands and wives whose marriages are at some stage more churlish than cherish can surf the net for an affair. What is even more unnerving is clearly there is a market for this "service" as more and more of these sites are springing up. "Illicit Encounters" - a discreet and confidential extra marial affair service; "AffairsClub" - for the married and lonely, to name just a few, yet all have one common clear message -  Find Passion, Have an Affair!

What has our society become when we allow the sanctity of marriage to be so openly vilified by viewing affairs in a positive light? Tempting and encouraging people to partake. Surely by making having an affair so easily accessable indicates that it is perfectly acceptable, I mean everyone else is doing it so why not??

10 years ago surfing the net for love was frowned upon and deemed as a little desparate but look at it now. It is as socially acceptable as sending a birthday card online. I fear the same will happen with online affairs to the point where the illicitness and danger of it will become the norm. Not to mention the implicatons should one adulterer fall in "love" with their "partner in crime". Surely, these sites are just setting up already unhappy people for even more sorrow??

And I wonder too if the people who operate or work in them are married??

10 comments:

  1. Sometimes when my husband and I are bored we will go on those kinds of sites to look at people’s pictures and profiles to make fun of them. We found one of my husband’s guy friends on there. He changed his name to “Wayne” though and put down he likes nipple torture and anal stimulation. Who would’ve known? It was very entertaining.

    BTW I am glad you liked my guest post. I like your blog! How do I follow it? I did not see a button for that.

    piciklesinmyass.blogspot.com

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  2. Hello Mrs Pickles

    How did you manage to look "Wayne" in the eye again?? Did you let him know you knew? How funny but it does prove that you don't truly know anyone.
    I see you found the Follow button, thank you. I'll be along to your site very soon as I'm looking forward to more entertaining hilarious reads.

    Take Care
    GEM

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  3. I know what you mean about those dating and having one night casual sex stand kind of sites. The one night stand sex sites, I have check out- with my wife- for laughs. It shows how screwed up a lot of people are out there. I've never checked out the married ones before. But then again, I never will. I'm quite happily married and have been for almost 22 years now. Another thing that still puzzles me about the popularity of these sites is that you don't really know what you're going to get when you finally meet the person you've been chatting with online. Call me old fashioned but I still think it is a dangerous way to meet or hook up with someone.

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  4. Hi Kelly

    I find it incredulous that they have such sites for married people! I think it's so crass.
    The other sites I guess are not much different to the lonely hearts ads that you get in newspapers or in the back of some top shelf magazine. I tried online dating once (not Shagbook!) and it went against everything I believe. Like you I'm old fashioned when it comes to looking for love and prefer the more romantic encounters.......properbly that's why I'm still single, maybe I'm searching for something that simply doesn't exist!!

    Take Care

    GEM

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  5. I've used dating sites in the past such as Lavalife and being a little on the shy side when it comes to woman I've found it can be easier to break the ice and get to know someone. However that was a few years ago when it was still considered taboo. Now it's ridiculous I don't think I would ever use them again and these affair sites for married people are pathetic and just shows you they shouldn't have gotten married in the first place.

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  6. Hi Wolf

    I'd like to think that there are more people against the "have an affair" sites than for, and you're absolutely right that anyone using them should not have married in the first place or at least get the hell out of their marriage if it is so bad they stoop to such depths.

    On another note please can you post another ranting at celebs for just being famous. I read one you did last year "Justin Bieber....". It made me feel so much better afterwards, it was almost like I'd written it myself!! Genius!!

    Take cAre

    GEM

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  7. Hi Gem! I am a friend of Klahanie's and he recommended your blog. I agree with the principle of online dating being a last resort for most people and married dating sites irritate me to no end. Society has come to making promises to get their way and then not worry about keeping them. Unfortunately it seems that the sacred vows of marriage are nothing more than a convenience as long as no one pisses the other off. It's sad really. I have kept my vows and have no intentions of breaking them. That doesn't make me perfect but I stand up for what I believe in. great post and thank you.

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  8. Hi Heather

    Thanks for popping by and your great comments! Marriage is certainly devalued and divorce too easy. Glad to hear you're one of the faithful!

    I'll be along to check out your post very soon.

    take Care

    GEM

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  9. "Shagbook"? ?? really?? Where do I sign up??

    I heard in Italy most marriages are "open marriages" where each partner is free to take lovers as they wish. Don't think I could feel good about that one... but I'm just a jealous American housewife!!

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  10. Hi MMW

    Me neither. I'm very loyal in relationships and could not accept my partner being with someone else nor could I do that to him. Not sure if its predominant in Italy particularly but since divorce is taboo I guess it maybe the only way some marriages can survive and keep families together.

    Thanks for coming by and just in case you get bored, here's the link to shagbook: http://www.shagbook.com/....;)))

    take care

    GEM

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